Do I ever learn?

Now one would think that after just experiencing this very similar situation about a month ago I would have learned something but ah of course not. I keep fighting.
I have been searching for a part time job for the last two weeks quite intensely. But I've reached the end of my rope and my desire to find one. As I always do. I all too often go after what I want intensely for a very focused period of time and then I realize time and time again no matter how hard I try I can't make the world turn 'round. I'm not big enough. I just experienced this in finding the job that I am just now starting. I had attempted EVERYTHING to make it happen in other places, even at camp. But finally when I'd given up hope at making things work, a connection is made and the ball starts rolling. A connection of course that is completely out of my control. And here I am doing it again. I want a part time job. More importantly, I need a part time job, as much for my sanity as for the money. I need something else to make me stop doing things with my other job; otherwise it will become my life. See I have this problem that once I start something I see absolutely everything that needs to be done and then I work like a busy beaver no matter the hours or energy it takes to accomplish until its accomplished...if I don't have anything better to do. I need something else to pull me away. In essence I'm obsessive. And I need the money, though I'm coming to terms with the idea that God can provide the money with or without the job.
So I've put out a lot of applications at a lot of places. I've called a lot of places. I've attempted to follow through, but there is never a personal connection and life only seems to set things up for me through personal connections. Or I prefer it to be that. But I've been trying to make it happen so without the personal connection and it is going absolutely NOWHERE!
So I'm done. I can't do it. And it's going to take a miracle to get me a job because I don't have very many connections out here (outside of Erica and all of her connections :-P).
I'm done jumping through hoops.
I'm done trying to wrack my brain to make the finances line up.
I'm done worrying.
I can't make the world turn round.
I can't make people hire me. No amount of schmoozing will be enough if its not meant to happen. And I'm going to make mistakes in how I handle sending in my applications and talking to folks and I could waste an inexhaustible amount of time and energy rehashing how and why I should have done things differently. But if its supposed to happen, it will inspite of my mistakes.
God will provide.