my friend handed me a book yesterday and mentioned something along the lines of this would be a good light read for you. she always does this handing me the ones with the cover from the eighties or the pinkest girliest font. this one was called 'altar call'.
now i don't read chick porn--i gave up that stuff a long time ago when i realized what unrealistic expectations it places on relationships and i don't read christian feel good novels--again sets up expectations/cookie cutter answers to God. plus i tend to live a bit too vicariously through novels--how else do you think i survived junior high?!?
but i always read the ones that she hands me...mostly out of curiousity and a little bit of indulgence. indulgence of something that lies buried deep inside of me.
funny that this one should be about a girl in her late twenties who gives herself a makeover by moving to a new place and ends up realizing her heart was really back at home. i've been seeing this theme reoccuring in a lot of things that have come across my path recently. but that's beside the point.
i still walk away at the end of the novel with two completely contradictory ideas--it happens with any chick flick-ish thing. it doesn't happen like that in real life--people don't always work things out and its hardly ever that clear. you don't always get your happy ending....but then why does my heart break at this-every time?
a man isn't going to chase after you. besides the last time it didn't work out so well.
but i still want someone to.
you are supposed to be strong and independent-not controlled by your emotion.
but i want to fall in love.
guard your heart; don't let anyone determine your life for you-absolute freedom.
if people aren't my life, then what is?

logic vs love

any wonder i'm confused?